Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts

Monday, January 23, 2012

Calendar Memoirs - The Blog I Won't Regret


January 21, 2012: I "read" a new book every few days – the quotations around the word 'read' are because I actually listen to downloaded audiobooks while I check my e-mail, surf the web, work on photos. It helps pass the time and keep me going when I would otherwise get bored, tired (unfortunately too often) or want to quit.

(Yes, that's a picture of a digital bookworm - I sure wish it was cuter.) If you live in the Phoenix area and have a library card from your own city, you can check out digital audio books and download the WMA software here. If you live elsewhere, find out if your city has a Digital Library by googling.

The power of story is my motivator. How fitting then that a few lines from last night’s book are what make me start writing Calendar Memoirs – the blog I’ve been putting off for 6 months, maybe more.

Ask For It: How Women's can Use the Power of Negotiation by Linda Babcock, WMA Audio Book (Or buy Ask for It in paperback - Their first paperback book that led to this one is Women Don’t Ask)

Part Two, Phase 1, Chapter 2 (00:00): “What will you regret? Researchers have found that people experience two different kinds of regret. Regret about things they've done and regret about the things they didn't do. … When asked to identify the biggest regret in their life, people are 2 to 3 more times likely to describe something they didn't do instead of something they did.

So try approaching the question of what will make you happy from a different angle altogether. What will you regret not doing? … Is there's something you always planned to do but never got around to? How sorry will you feel if you never make it happen?“


This quote summarizes the number one reason why I am thankful that I stopped everything and moved to the Dominican Republic on January 19th of 2010. I felt so strongly that I was supposed to go, and even though I can’t tell you exactly what I was supposed to do there, or what I accomplished, I can tell you I will never have to wonder “What if…?”

I also know that many of my life lessons from that time have come months or even a year later. And like many of you, I learn a lot about myself by writing. I created a list called “What I learned about life while in the Dominican Republic” that I’ll share with you in this blog – perhaps a little at time. Those who have seen it feel what I learned has opened their own eyes about their own lives, wherever they are – because oddly, the lessons have nothing to do with the location.

Share with me as I flit from year to year and place to place in Calendar Memoirs. Insight and philosophy based on day to day habits and adventures - what I see and what I learn, hopefully helping you to see your own lives and relationships in new and amazing ways, and of course what I’ve done (a bit of a travel guide – in Dominican Republic, Mexico, Arizona, Chicago, California, even your own town). We’ll take walks, go to art galleries, the theater, see movies, read books, take nature hikes and take photos, visit friends and family and eavesdrop on my life.

Heather J. Kirk, Photographer, Author, Graphic Designer."We..." an e-book at: photographicartistry.citymax.com/Books Find her art at: Artist Websites and HeatherJKirk.com

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Amazing Friends Ask "How Can We Help?" An example to follow...

A close family member recently became very ill and my mother asked me to contact some friends. When I stopped by and shared the news, first they listened, then asked "How can we help?"

I didn't know how to answer that question in the moment, but the offer created peace. If we needed something, I knew where to comfortably go for assistance.

But the offer didn't stop there, they began to offer ways to help. This is a fantastic way to be of help - because someone is under stress or shock it's hard to think of what you need.

Here are some things they came up with: Pray and contact the pastor, e-mail friends (they took notes on the situation to make sure they got the information right), keep an eye on the house, take people to or pick up people at the airport.

In addition to asking how to help the people affected, they also wanted to know what they could do to help me personally.

What a fantastic example of how to be a true friend to someone in need.

My favorite way to help me in the moment: "Can we send you home with some 'Prozac"?" Code for double fudge brownies!

Thank you! For the brownies, for the offer to help, for thinking up ways to help even when I could not, and for a wonderful example to follow.

Heather