Showing posts with label women. Show all posts
Showing posts with label women. Show all posts

Sunday, November 6, 2016

How sex plays a role in this election (and probably not what you were thinking)

Part  II of my little "We DO get what we want" election series.
How sex plays a role in this election
(and probably not what you were thinking)

If  you read yesterday's post, you know what I think of the choices we have made as our party representatives for President, so I will just start with ... And finally (well not finally, but I've had enough) ...

Why are we surprised that there are some powerful men (including a presidential candidate and a candidate's husband)?:
1. Have a history of (or history of accusations of) objectifying women;
2. Would try to avoid talking about it; and
3. Have women in their lives who stand by them.

We are also oddly surprised that some women who have been objectified or used sexually:
1. Would not come forward right away;
2. Would only do so years later and in the safety of numbers;
3. Had even possibly hoped to get something out of it - whether defensively, like keeping their jobs, or actively in hopes of getting ahead.

Neither of these should be a surprise when our culture is shockingly full of women competing and begging for male attention, or attempting to get ahead in life using their sexuality - I mean that's what advertisements and pop culture (music videos, concerts, movies, TV, news stories)  try to teach us in necessary, isn't it?

Of course in real life many women (even most, go figure) actually get ahead by being smart, talented and educated, having connections, friends and determination. But at the same time, perhaps because of wanting a dream at all costs, or the economy making it hard to get a job, or single motherhood and costs of childcare, or inequitable pay for equal work, or pressure by a boss to give in or keep quiet, and many other reasons...some women may feel they need to do whatever it takes to get or keep a job.


Many women know that it means pretending not to notice a brush of a hand against a body part, or competing with coworkers for the bosses attention in ways that may put other women down.

And then whether they fit that stereotype or not - women who are groped or assaulted or even have sex because they feel it is required, or at least very helpful, to keep their jobs, fail to come forward for fear of being blamed or not being believed.

So again I say this is, at least in part, our own fault.

We apparently think it is okay to have Victoria Secret's fashion shows on TV, with commercials running during prime time family programs. We let our girls wear short shorts because they insist their friends are. We take or send them to concerts with women wearing hardly anything, or men simulating sex on stage. We tell our adult friends to suck it up at work or dress hotter or go ahead and have that affair with the boss - it will be worth it. And so on...

We say boys will be boys. Men don't call their friend's on their behavior because they don't want to be seen as wooses or 'homos" or disloyal to the "male race". We say our athletes, movie starts or musicians wouldn't "need" to pay or force women to have sex. We shut our eyes when we see women who are repeatedly 'walk into doorknobs". And so on... 

Why then are we surprised that we are all messed up sexually as a nation.

Oh, some of you think I've gone too far now... And why? Because I've stopped talking about the candidates and slipped into what we accept as acceptable...or do nothing about. Because I am saying that we explain away too often others behaviors by saying 'to each his own'.

So, if you want to get back to the candidates, fine. One is a wealthy powerful man who many women have come forward to say they were treated like a piece of meat or sexually assaulted. One's husband, as President of the United States, used his power and position to manipulate at least one young female intern, and paid off several lawsuits to keep other women quiet. And this candidate did not appear to hold him accountable. Or her own ambition was great enough to stick with him anyway.

So in my opinion, the lesser of two evils is a terrible way to choose, but at least one has not already played a role in defiling the Oval Room.

What women rightly long for is spiritual and moral initiative from a man, not spiritual and moral domination.- John Piper, Chancellor of Bethlehem College & Seminary

Blessings to My Purposeful People, Heather J. Kirk

Wearable Art - Heather J Kirk's VIDA Collection: http://shopvida.com/collections/heather-j-kirk
Art by Heather J. Kirk http://heather-kirk.pixels.com and http://AEC.pixels.com
Literature by Heather J. Kirk http://www.photographicartistry.citymax.com/Books.html



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#election #responsibility #vote# women #sexualassault #victim #popularculture #hillary #bill #clinton #thedonald #trump #equalpay #sexuality, 

Sunday, February 8, 2015

Hearing the Unconditional in "All of Me" by John Legend

I knew the chorus to "All of Me" by John legend (You Tube link with lyrics below), and found it truly poetic and beautiful, but didn't really appreciate hearing it in my church. I'm a bit off put by using secular songs, especially secular love songs being used to illustrate God's love. If you try to make the straight comparison throughout an entire songs lyrics of human love, something always falls horribly apart - cheating, lust, possessiveness, hurt, anger, fantasy, loss, unrequited love, once had now gone...something decidedly human I don't want in a God's love for me.

And yet, "love your curves and all your edges, all your perfect imperfections," while starting with a sensual image quickly moves to the psyche and the whole person. It sounds just like unconditional love! "You're my end and my beginning, even when I lose I'm winning."

"The Curve of the Hip" copyright Heather J. Kirk

Most people growing up in the United States have heard the verses used most often to refer to God's love (whether we truly understand or accept it or not), John 3:16: "For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life."

The Sun's Son Cross Callage
And we have heard the seemingly impossible high bar set for human love so often heard at weddings, that we think is beautiful, but don't really believe will last past the first few years of marriage, I Corinthians 13:4 - 8: "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."

But what comes to mind here in the song "All of Me" is not a love that has to die or work really hard, but a love that just IS, like that found in Romans 5:8: "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

Did you catch that beautiful part? "While we were still sinners.." To be loved and accepted just like you are, just like I am, "all your curves and all your edges"! You don't have to figure it all out or change to meet the requirements before being loved, you ARE loved with "all your perfect imperfections"!

For the first time I decided to listen to ALL the words, and decided this is  how I want to love and be loved, and I almost see myself as that girl being sung to, the one who is sometimes confused, "drawing me in and you kicking me out, no kidding, got my head spinning,  I can't pin you down, what's going on in that beautiful mind?"


"Vulnerability" copyright Heather J. Kirk

People ARE inconsistent sometimes, as humans we become doubtful of the others affections, then love with wild abandon, we have good days and bad days, we fear and mistrust, then throw caution to the wind and trust completely, and bring it back round again.


Sequined Photographer copyright by Heather J KirkYet to be told in spite of that, "'Cause all of me, loves all of you!" That's how we want to be loved, how we want to love, both with each other and with God. "Give your all to me, I'll give my all to you. You're my end and my beginning, even when I lose I'm winning."

Listen to "All of Me" by John Legend and read the lyrics here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mk7-GRWq7wA

Heather J. Kirk Art by Heather J. Kirk www.heather-kirk.artistwebsites.com
Literature by Heather J. Kirk http://www.photographicartistry.citymax.com/Books.html

#allofme #johnlegend #unconditionallove

Monday, September 22, 2014

It does not go away...have the guts to leave, get help or intervene

It's time we all educate ourselves more about domestic violence and INTERVENE, because many women clearly don't know how to help or extricate themselves. This video show it is not an "every once in awhile" thing. I lost count, but 6 or 7 or 8 times in one year...and progressively rse. Once it starts, it can only get worse and end badly if BOTH parties don't get help.


This Woman Took A Photo Of Herself Every Day For A Year. I Was In Tears When I Saw The Last One.

By sharing photos of one woman’s face over the course of a year, this video conveys a powerful message that needs to be shared. “One photo a day in the...


(*Disclaimer – they did use a model and make up, but that makes it no less real. The Croatian campaign was stared after too many domestic violence deaths.)

Heather J. Kirk
Art by Heather J. Kirk www.heather-kirk.artistwebsites.com
Literature by Heather J. Kirk http://www.photographicartistry.citymax.com/Books.html